2376. RB to EBB
As published in The Brownings’ Correspondence, 12, 348–349.
[London]
Friday. [Postmark: 22 May 1846]
I have a great mind to retract .. I do retract altogether whatever I said the other day in explanation of Miss Heaton’s story: [1] I make no doubt, now, it was a pure dream to which my over-scrupulousless [sic] of conscience gave a local habitation and name both, thro’ the favourable dimness and illusion of “a good many years ago”—because this last charge about “Miss Campbell” .. briefly—I never in my life saw, to my knowledge, a woman of that name—nor can there be any woman of any other name from my acquaintance with whom the merest misunderstanding in the world could possibly arise to a third person .. I mean, that it must be a simple falsehood and not gossip & distortion of fact, as I supposed in the other case. I told you of the one instance where such distortion might take place,—(Miss Haworth, to avoid mistake)– [2] This charge, after the other .. I will tell you of what it reminds me—in my early boyhood I had a habit of calling people “fools,” with as little reverence as could be, .. and it used to be solemnly represented to me after such offences that “whoso calleth his brother “fool” is in danger” &c “for he hath committed murder in his heart already” [3] &c in short,—there was no help for it,—I stood there a convicted-murderer .. to which I was forced penitently to agree .. here is Miss Heaton’s charge & my confession. Now, let a policeman come here presently to ask what I know about the “Deptford Murder” or the “Marshalsea Massacre” .. and you will have my “intimate friend’s” charge .. By the way, did your brother overhear this, or was it spoken to someone in his company, or is my friend his acquaintance also? Because in either of the latter cases I can interfere easily. (There is a Mr Browning—(Henry, I think,) living in, or near the Regent’s Park.)– At all events, please say that I know no such person, nor ever knew,—that the whole is a pure falsehood—(and I only use so mild a word because I write to you, and because on reading the letter again I see the speakers were women)–
It is a fact that I have made myself almost ridiculous by a kind of male prudery with respect to “young ladies” .. that I have seemed to imply—“If I gave you the least encouragement something would be sure to follow.” In fact, never seeing any attractiveness in the class, I was very little inclined to get involved in troubles & troubles for nothing at all. And as for marrying .. that is a point on which I have certainly not chosen to dilate before you, nor shall I now dilate on it–
Well, I shall see you to-morrow; that remedies everything. —And that is your way of letting me see the Review,—you send it! Not that it has arrived yet. Dear Ba, how ever good you are!
All about the lady enthusiasts makes me laugh: don’t think I fail of the proper respect to them, however: it is only once in a week that one sees a real painted Emperor settle on a flower, and then perhaps for a few minutes—while at all times, if you look, you will find a good half dozen of earnest yet sleepy drones living there, working away at the sweet,—after all, these get the most out of the flower.
Did you really go out yesterday? I was not sure, for the wind was Easterly .. but it appears to have done you no harm,—you may “go into the street” to-day—I am most happy,—most happy.
—and always, entirely happy in you,—in thinking of you, and hoping,—my life is in you now–
Bless you, dearest—I am your own RB
2 o’clock/ The parcel arrives .. thank you, Best of Ba’s! I will read and tell you—(only, what on earth do you mean by sending back those sketches?)
Address: Miss Barrett, / 50. Wimpole St
Postmark: 8NT8 MY22 1846 O.
Docket, in EBB’s hand: 189.
Publication: RB-EBB, pp. 722–723.
Manuscript: Wellesley College.
1. See letter 2363.
2. For a complete account of the friendship between Fanny Haworth and RB, see vol. 3, pp. 314–315.
3. Cf. Matthew 5:22 and 5:28.
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