2566. RB to EBB
As published in The Brownings’ Correspondence, 13, 307–309.
[London]
Friday. [Postmark: 28 August 1846]
I was beginning to dress, hours before the proper time, thro’ the confidence of seeing you now,—after the letter which came early in the morning,—when this new letter changes everything. It just strikes me, what a comfort it is that whenever such a disappointment is inevitable, your hand or voice announces it, and not anothers—no second person bids me stay away for good reasons I must take in trust, leaving me to deal with the innumerable fancies that arise: on the contrary, you contrive that with the one misfortune, twenty kindnesses shall reach me: can I be very sorry now, for instance, that you tell me why it is, and how it affects you, and how it will affect me in the end? dear Ba, if you will not believe in the immortality of love, do think the poor thought that when love shall end, gratitude will begin!
I altogether agree with you .. it is best to keep away: we can not be too cautious now at the “end of things”– [1] I am prepared for difficulties enough, without needing to cause them by any rashness or wilfulness of my own. I really expect, for example, that out of the various plans of these sympathizing friends and relatives some one will mature itself sufficiently to be directly proposed to you, for your acceptance or refusal, contingent on your father’s approbation; the shortness of the remaining travelling season serving to compel a speedy development. Or what if your father, who was the first to propose, or at least talk about, a voyage to Malta or elsewhere, when you took no interest in the matter comparatively,—and who perhaps chiefly found fault with last year’s scheme from its not originating with himself .. what if he should again determine on some such voyage now that you are apparently as obedient to his wishes as can be desired? Would it be strange, not to say improbable, if he tells you some fine morning that your passage is taken to Madeira, or Palermo? Because, all the attempts in the world cannot hide the truth from the mind, any more than all five fingers before the eyes keep out the sun at noonday,—you see a red thro’ them all—and your father must see your improved health and strength, and divine the opinion of everybody round him as to the simple, proper course for the complete restoration of them. Therefore be prepared, my own Ba!
In any case, I trust in you wholly–
There is nothing to decide upon, with respect to Mrs Jameson– The reasons for not sharing that confidence with her are irrefragable. I only thought of you, dearest, who have to bear her all but direct enquiries: you know, I undergo nothing of the kind. Any such arrangement as that of taking her up at Orleans would be very practicable. I rejoice in your desire (by the way) of going rapidly on, stopping nowhere, till we reach our appointed place—because that spirit helps the body wonderfully—and, in this case, exactly corresponds with mine. Above all, I should hate to be seen at Paris by anybody a few days only after our adventure– Chorley will be there, and the Arnoulds,—for one party!
What could it be, you thought should make you “sorry”, in that letter of yesterday, love? What was I to “forgive”? Certainly you are unforgiven hitherto, for the best of reasons.
And assure yourself, dearest, that I have told my family nothing that can possibly mislead them. Remember that I have the advantage of knowing those I speak to,—their tastes, and understandings, and notions of what is advantageous and what otherwise. I spoke the simple truth about your heart—of your mind they knew something already– I explained your position with respect to your father .. unfortunately, a very few plain words do that .. I mean, a few facts, such as the parish register could supply .. sufficiently to exonerate you and me.
As to my copyrights, I never meant to sell them—it would be foolish: because, since some little time, and in consequence of the establishment of the fact that my poems,—even in their present disadvantageous form, without advertisements, and unnoticed by the influential journals—do somehow manage to pay their expenses, I have had one direct offer to print a new edition,—and there are reasons for thinking, two or three booksellers, that I know, would come to terms. Smith & Elder, for instance, wrote to offer to print any poem about Italy, in any form, with any amount of advertisements, on condition of sharing profits .. taking all risk off my hands .. concluding with more than a hint that if that proposition was not favorable enough, they would try and agree to any reasonable demand. [2]
Because Moxon is the “slowest” of publishers, and if one of his books can only contrive to pay its expenses, you may be sure that a more enterprising brother of the craft would have sent it into a second or third edition. Yet Moxon’s slow self even, anticipates success for the next venture. Now the fact is, not having really cared about anything except not losing too much money, I have taken very little care of my concerns in that way—not calling on Moxon for months together. But all will be different now—and I shall look into matters, and turn my experience to account, such as it is.
Well,—I am yours, you are mine, dearest Ba! I love you, I think, perceptibly more in these latter days! Is this absence contrived on purpose to prove how foolishly I said that I loved you the more from seeing you the oftener? Ah, you reconcile all extremes, destroy the force of all logic-books, my father’s or mine—that was true, but this is also true (logical or no) that I now love you thro’ not seeing you,—loving more, as I desire more to be with you, my best, dearest wife that will be .. (I could not help writing it—why should it sound sweetlier than “Ba”?)
Your very own RB
Address: Miss Barrett, / 50. Wimpole Street.
Postmark: 8NT8 AU28 1846 B.
Publication: RB-EBB, pp. 1013–16.
Manuscript: Wellesley College.
1. Cf. I Peter 4:7.
2. Eventually RB was to approach Smith from Italy, using Henry Chorley as a mediator, to act as his publisher, as well as EBB’s. Smith had to decline because of serious financial problems, which RB was not to learn until years later. See letter 2392, in which RB recommended Smith and Elder as potential publishers of Fanny Haworth’s projected book.
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