412. EBB to Hugh Stuart Boyd
As published in The Brownings’ Correspondence, 2, 298–299.
[Hope End]
Wednesday. May 4th 1831
My dearest friend,
When Eliza [Cliffe] first told me of having written to you, much as I felt the kindness of her motive, I regretted her having done it. I was fearful that you had given me as much time as you could conveniently, & that you might be annoyed by being spoken to about extending it. I am much obliged to you for giving me another week; & I think it very kind & considerate in you to suffer “willingly” the uncertainty so long. At the end of that time, if nothing conclusive happens, you may depend on my speaking. I myself see the necessity of doing so—for, as to giving up having you here, in the case of there being the slightest chance of no insurmountable obstacle intervening, you cannot suppose that I should or would or could think of such a thing.
If Eliza had not written the other day, I think I myself would have written to you this morning & sent my letter by a private messenger, that you might be able to send me an answer as to whether you would let me put off the question beyond tonight, or whether you would still wish me to ask it. My reason for doing this would have been what I heard yesterday afternoon,—which has made me apprehend that we shall know too soon about the mystery. Did I tell you the report of Kenrick, at whose house the fat gentleman [1] lodged, being appointed land stewart? Well! that report must be certainly true! Kenrick had a letter from this principal last Friday, which he shewed yesterday to Daly. The letter desired that he, Kenrick, would immediately begin to plough the fields,—that he would take an exact account of the live stock at present in the pastures,—& that he would make Daly attend to the garden. There was besides some allusion to the house,—as if it were considered no longer inhabited!—— After this, & after hearing that the 12th of May is a moving day, I would certainly, I think, have asked you to wait for a day or two more—as that day or two may decide so much. The writer of the letter is to be here in a few days!——
Last Saturday we were talking about my aunt Miss Clarke—as to the probability of her being in London or not. Henrietta said she was probably there,—and I maintained that it was very unlikely that she should have left Fenham. Papa was perfectly silent. The next morning, he sent a letter to London directed to her at George’s Hotel Albemarle Street!—— So you see, he knew all about it, all the time. There is nothing but mysteries!——
Arabel sends you the cup. À propos to “presumption,” are you aware that my eloquent & intellectual cousin Dominick Trant is a candidate with Mr Knowles for the representation of Shaftesbury? Papa is so angry, & anxious for his defeat!—— [2] When will people know what they are fit for? Not until they cease to be —— If Mr Trant had called upon you, your judgment would have been able to fill up that hiatus; but as it is, your ingenuity must do it. Sir Thomas Butler has come forwards for Carlow. I hope he will do us more credit. [3]
Of course I will go again to see you, my dearest friend, if it is possible. But circumstances are not in my power,—& what may be the event of the next hour, it makes me even sick to think of!—— Are not the probabilities against my ever going to Malvern again? and if you do not go where we do, are they not against our ever meeting again? I may see Mrs Boyd & Annie—but how can I hope to see you? You know, Papa will not let me travel to any distance to visit my nearest relatives,—and whatever my own feelings may be, he would rather give such a permission on their account, than on yours!—— The future, present, & past, all make me turn from them—but why should I write what you can scarcely have pleasure in reading?
Ever yours affectionately
E B Barrett.
Our best love to Mrs Boyd & Annie. Did Annie give you a message from Arabel about writing some verses for her album?
I forgot to say that Kenrick began on Monday to plough the fields. Pray, do not tell anyone the particulars you hear from me.
Address, on integral page: H. S Boyd Esqr / Woodland Lodge / Great Malvern.
Publication: EBB-HSB, pp. 126–128.
Manuscript: Wellesley College.
1. i.e., Reid, the mortgagees’ agent (see letter 409).
2. Papa’s wish was granted. Knowles stood for Parliament again in 1832 and 1835, also unsuccessfully.
3. He didn’t.
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