91. EBB to Samuel Moulton-Barrett (uncle)
As published in The Brownings’ Correspondence, 1, 80–81.
Worthing
June 19th 1819
My dearest Sam,
I shall always be grateful to those who will trouble themselves to admonish me or to warn me of my faults and I am sensible that I deserve a great deal of your censure and many of your remarks! But I cannot plead guilty to what you believe concerning my wishing to “pry into individual characters” or to “expose the blemishes” of those friends to whom I owe so much! The lines to which you allude [1] were the production of an idle hour and were never meant for any other eye than my own and it was entirely by an accident that it was ever known that “Vissions” [sic] were in existance—for I was and am sensible of the impropriety of my judgeing of characters which are so far superior to mine—and confident in my own integrity though not in my perfections I never wished and I trust in God I never shall to “draw the veil[”] from the frailties of those beloved relations whose kindnesses I never never can repay– Having thus warmly and believe me sincerely exprest myself, I own that I have acted both wrongly & inconsiderately in having allowed myself to sketch even the virtues of my friends: and forgive me if I assure you that if I did wrong I did it unintentionally & that in Mr Mac Swineys; Malice did not in the slightest degree influence either my heart or my pen. [2] And now my dearest Sam to prove to you my real sincere repentance and the value I attach to your opinion I promise you that I will never indulge myself again in triffling with the frailties of others and that as long as I live upon that point (as far as I am able) you shall never have a moments uneasiness– I confess and I have ever allowed that I borrowed the idea of that stanza in the hymn from an anectate [sic] in a book (whose name now I forget) where a soldier prays before a battle in these words “Lord if I forget thee on the day of battle, do not thou forget me!” [3] A Thousand thanks for the bracelet! can I ever be grateful enough for all your kindness?
Publication: None traced.
Source: EBB’s draft, Pierpont Morgan Library.
1. Apparently an unpublished poem titled “Visions” (copy in Mary Moulton-Barrett’s hand at Berg), dated 17 January 1819, using fictitious names in discussing the characteristics of several people, including her mother and father (see Reconstruction, D1097).
2. Malice or not, EBB’s delineation of McSwiney is far from complimentary, including such comments as “With love of titles writ upon his face”; “does not, quite detest a glass of wine”; “Ambitious—nor of fame, as yet quite sick”; “For Paddy’s heart it cannot be denied / Joins Irish prejudice, to Irish pride.”
3. The prayer offered before the battle of Edgehill (1642) by Major-Gen. Sir Jacob Astley (1579–1652), recounted by Sir Philip Warwick in his Memoires of the reigne of King Charles I (1701).
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