2695. EBB to Sarianna Browning
As published in The Brownings’ Correspondence, 14, 284–285.
[Florence]
August 21– [1847] [1]
My dearest Sarianna it seems to me a shame that so many letters should go to Hatcham without a little note from me, who owe you thanks for yours, besides the other gratitude. And then I do want to beg you & your dear mother, never more to be “miserable” in consequence of what Robert may write to you in a moment of impulse & impatience. Surely you must know him, .. and that he is given to hear Lions roar round corners, and to see shadows of crocodiles dilated to the whole height & depth of his imagination. You know that it is his way to calculate how if such a thing does happen, & such a thing does’nt happen, & such another thing happens imperfectly, why so the world is to come to an end & not a raven be left to feed anybody. [2] The worst is that I am in disrepute as an upsetter of calculations & soother of fears,—my fault of insouciance in matters of this sort, having thrown me out altogether .. I am not worth listening to as an oracle. He says that I would never think of the means of life until I grew very hungry indeed, .. and that then, instead of setting myself to get some bread, I would snatch up a French novel to forget the hunger in. Which is rather like me, I do admit. I have rather a leaning toward shutting my eyes & opening my mouth, like the children. I believe in ravens & manna from Heaven. And after all, is’nt it better not to starve many times before one’s starvation, I do humbly submit to Robert? Now he is unhappy because of having made you unhappy .. and now I come to beg you never to be unhappy again for any such reason,—& to forgive us both (will your dear mother?) for having suggested the least uneasiness & anxiety to her & your thoughts of us. The money was ready sooner than it was wanted—there is the fact! and if it had been for himself only, he would not have feared for it, with all his imagination for fears.
We are very much disappointed not to have a chance any more of seeing dear Mr Kenyon this autumn,—having stayed in Florence on purpose as you know, & only to hear that he crosses the Alps in vain for us– So provoking it is! It was vexation enough, we thought, to be cast out ignobly from the monastery of Vallombrosa, .. rolled down the mountain-side at the heels of our four white bullocks! In time perhaps, we shall learn that the world is not made for us––
“The world for me, exclaimed a pampered goose”–
I have been so happy of late, that really I do rather open my eyes when the least thing goes or seems to go wrong, .. and this, after my long, long dreary apprenticeship to the sorrowfulness of life which is said to make one wiser. To be wise at all, one must have better Teachers than either Sorrow or Joy of itself can be. But make us joyful, if you can, by saying that your mother is not suffering– Robert thinks much & tenderly of her & of you all, and we talk together of the day when I shall see you, and not love you, for the first time. Meanwhile we are turning our faces toward Rome, & dream of setting off on this new journey in another month & of taking up our residence on the Tarpeian rock and of opening the lid of more wonders. Let us have your affection with us always, that we may go on to be happy, here or there .. and do remember us especially on the twelfth of September: I seem to feel as if the sun rose for me first on that day. With grateful love to your father & mother, I am, for every day, dearest Sarianna’s
affectionate sister
Ba–
Address, on integral page: Miss Browning.
Publication: None traced.
Manuscript: Lilly Library.
1. Year determined from EBB’s reference to visiting Vallombrosa.
2. EBB alludes to the ravens feeding Elijah by the brook Cherith (I Kings 17:3–6).
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