4236. EBB to Euphrasia Fanny Haworth
As published in The Brownings’ Correspondence, 25, 220–222.
Maison Versigny. 2 rue du Perrey
Le Hâvre
Sept 1– [1858] [1]
I know I am dyed black in sins, dearest Fanny. Try to forgive me. Shut your eyes on me, & believe that there’s something somewhere in the heart that is whiter than the outside,—something more affectionate & like a friend. So it is with me indeed. Dull as I feel just now, dull & without a spring to write, I can just respond to your appeal to do what you & Mr Gallenga [2] are pleased to call doing some good to you. But I doubt it. I dont think I can do good to you, I dont think so. What Aurora Leigh imagines concerning anything, wont be of weight– Booksellers have more faith in their “Readers” than in Auroras, in judging in mss. Better poets, even, have burrs in their locks, even if they have thrown their bonnet (with burr & bee in it) over the border: & booksellers despise burrs & bees & think little of poets. Still I will write a line at the end of this letter, above where the signature goes, and you can cut it off & use it—& it may perhaps (at best) get your ms glanced at instead of being thrown into a drawer without the glance. Still, a letter from yourself to Dickens would be more successful, I fancy. May you succeed, dear friend—may you. Which, if you do, you must thank rather your own merit for it than mine, indeed– [3]
How good of you to write in the face of my silence & how naughty of me to be silent in the face of those welcome witty amusing letters of yours which evoked me in vain. Poor ghost of a Ba– Dislodged ghost. I long for my dear lower life in Florence, & feel coldly in the upper world here,—notwithstanding some things there & some things here—for I have had movements of warm comfort & joy in holding my dearest Arabel’s hand, .. seeing her so well, so cheerful, & so tender. All these she is—but the atmosphere is not favorable—& I long for my dim Hades, [4] to faint away into the Dim & be quiet & silent, hiding my face in those dewy water-lilies of the Lethe river.
Thank you so much for sending me Lady Trelawney’s letter– [5] But why “unsatisfactory?” It is very difficult to propose to oneself even, in one’s imagination, any test which would be final to one’s conviction, and because a person does not fall upon such immediately, we must not argue broadly against the truth of the phenomena. If I were Lady Trelawney I would persist till I reached a conviction on one side or the other. I am glad that she has a favorable impression of Miss Andrews, [6] of whom I heard such astonishing things from Mrs Crosland. Mrs Crosland too had known her for years & relied on her truth—only the question of “truth” leaves the other point of possible “self-deception” untouched. I should like to know if the hands are seen in seânces at Mrs Milner Gibson’s, or if this apparition is to herself alone. Then with regard to writings apart from the human vehicle– I should like to hear if such a manifestation occurs. Does not Mrs Gibson write to you? would she not write details? as she cares for “making converts” too!–
I am very, very sorry at your ill-fortune in the matter of the house. [7] And probably the obstacle to letting, would be one to selling: otherwise, if I were you, I would sell at a sacrifice even, & have done with it. Take courage any way. You have enough to live on without the house, and even if you had not, & were thrown on your talents for support, I could not call you unhappy on that account. Not from my point of view, observe– People in general however, who have no sensibility, for some other classes of evil, are immensely sympathetical upon this—poverty is a grief au niveau de tout le monde. [8] May God keep you from all other griefs first–
I have a letter from Mrs Eckley– Yes, is’nt she a poetical, pure, lovely creature? She covers the earth with her own white garments, & so walks clean-footed over dirty places. For my own part, her love makes me sad, sad, sad—she sees me through it so different from what I am. What is so humiliating as being over-prized? [9] When one is scorned, spat upon by disdainful souls, something rises up in us through the very bitterness of a wrong to assert the sweetness of a comparative innocense—we venture to look at God and say .. “Between Thee & me, it is so—but between the world & me it is not so bad .. not so bad as this imputation.” But when one is lifted up with an undue exultation, there is nothing for us but to fall a dead weight––and oh, on what a hard stony ground we do fall–
She tells me that you are going back to the Tassinaris, which proves that the ‘Bagni’ have not been overattractive to you after all, nor the Tassinari villa too unpleasant. At the villa you have liberty & repose—excellent things. Now about Rome: I cant indeed advise you on the subject of a companion– Ellen Heaton writes to ask my advice, and you also– Now how can I advise? Two incomes go farther than one, that is a clear advantage—and if you suffer from solitude, you lose that evil, in setting up a companionship—and if the companionship has nothing in itself vexatious .. well. She is gentle goodhumoured, inclined to the same tastes as yourself– She will respect your talents, and facilitate their exercise in every way, I do not doubt, as far as depends on her– Now you should consider for yourself whether the arrangement will be satisfactory. As to our own plans, I cant say if we go to Rome or not,—I cant even say if I wish it. I am in a grey cloud of indifference at this moment, & cant get up a wish .. except for Hades, as I said—and Rome scarcely answers to the name–
Oh no—Isa Blagden would never go to the Bagni—never– She suffered too much last time—& she hates the place, besides– She talks of Leghorn & the island of Elba– It will be Leghorn, probably–
Write & tell me of yourself, & mind you get some spiritual news from England for me. Not a book-name can I find for you– ‘Third Love’ might tell the story too much, perhaps–
<…> [10]
May God bless you, says Ba in a more loving voice– May God bless you dearest Fanny.
Robert’s love & Peni’s. Pen was vowing to answer your letter, but I cant wait for his—& he has been absorbed in a paradise of uncles & aunts & ships,—poor child–
Address: La Toscane– / à Mademoiselle / Mademoiselle Fanny Haworth / Poste Restante / Bagni di Lucca.
Publication: None traced.
Manuscript: Fitzwilliam Museum.
1. Year provided by postmark.
2. Antonio Carlo Gallenga (pseud. Luigi Mariotti, 1810–95), Italian journalist, fled Italy in 1831 after being imprisoned for revolutionary activities. In the early 1840’s he settled in England and began contributing to periodicals. He held the Italian chair at University College, London, from 1846 to 1858, though he returned to Italy for the first time in 1848 and began dividing his time between the two countries. In 1859 he became Italian correspondent for The Times.
3. We have been unable to identify the work being discussed. A comment by EBB toward the end of the letter suggests that the manuscript was a novel.
4. Cf. EBB, “Summing Up in Italy” (Last Poems, 1862), line 57: “… through the dim Hades-portal.”
5. Harriet Jane Salusbury-Trelawny (née Tremayne, 1821–79), eldest daughter of John Hearle Tremayne (1780–1851) and his wife, Caroline Matilda (née Lemon, 1789–1864). In 1842 she married John Salusbury-Trelawny (1816–85), Liberal M.P. for Tavistock (1843–52 and 1857–65), who became 9th Baronet on the death of his father, Sir William Lewis Salusbury-Trelawny (1781–1856).
6. Annie Elizabeth Shaw Andrews (see letter 4092, note 6).
7. 45 Onslow Square, Brompton (see letter 4105, note 3).
8. “Understandable to everyone.”
9. Fanny Haworth copied and sent this passage to Sophia Eckley (see SD2203).
10. Half a page has been excised, being, as indicated in the first paragraph, a note to a publisher, presumably Chapman and Hall, on Miss Haworth’s behalf.
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