SD1835. Alfred Moulton-Barrett to Septimus Moulton-Barrett
Published in The Brownings’ Correspondence, 21, 378 (in part).
[Marseilles]
Sunday 22 July 1855
My dear Sept
I got your letter dated the 19th only this morning—our letters crossed—in that which you received from me, you will see that I think you take a much more lamentable view of my affairs, than I take myself– You ask me to wait until my debts are compromised– I do not wish to have them compromised—& only wish my creditors should have patience– My marriage will not increase my expenditure—but diminish it—& for your especial edification, some months after that event has occurred (I do not say when it may, or may not) & we meet, I will produce my account books– If people will only talk as little about me as I do about them & if they will cease creating fiction where facts are wanting, I should infinitely prefer my existence– Since my engagment I have suffered most foul wrongs in this respect—friends—members of my family—have not only been told of me, but also the most hideous & disgusting assertions have been made of Her, whom I love far more than any– Bear with me Sept– It is but a natural feeling—and need I prove to you how strong I feel on this subject when I tell you that these libels have been traced by me to have had their origin in one of the nearest of my relatives– I had hoped some effort to mend & efface ill feelings would have been made when I had left England—far from it—the very opposite has been the case—long and contemptuous was the silence to any of the approaches which were made for peace– Therefore when you tell me all [1] feel anxious I reply it is not so—further than the anxiety of remorse of one that triumphed not followed these singular and unprecedented acts–
I deeply grieve you should have intercepted my letter to the Governor– His conduct did not seem to require my paying him respect– Lizzie insisted upon its being otherwise & I grieve therefore her wishes should have been intercepted– I wrote to the Governor also saying that if he “would only recognise our Betrothal, we would wait any time he pleased–[”]
I am & have ever been determined to implicate not one of you further than I was able– I suspected the Governor would attach blame to some one– If he does to one party & I hear of it, I will quickly disabuse his mind– (The Isle of Wight is not easily forgotten–) I did in my letter lay great stress on that fact[–]
In offending George’s feelings, I most bitterly regret– I shall always have the very highest sense of his generosity towards me & in anything he may say or any of my Brothers, I will always remember the days of my troubles– You must each & all of you feel most assured of our united gratitude—but when you ask me to wait & wait—until my debts are paid off says one—until they are compromised says another—until you are able to support a wife says a third—& when you ask the third “What is sufficient to support a wife” his reply is—for I have heard him—“£1000 a year!!” Now with a very comfortable income—how much I will not say—because we both have a hatred to have our means canvassed—from the housekeepers room to the sky parlor—but with a very comfortable income, reduced in expenditure, within the least possible limits, to disembarass myself of my debts; She consents to come to me to share a curate’s subsistence– In that way, I wrote to the Governor– You know my dearest Sept that she is not expensive, that she has not been accustomed to luxuries– You know how little she spends in dress & therefore she does not sacrifice much in consenting– In quoting a passage of your letter, that you “understand a formal request is to be made to the Governor” I have again to speak frankly & tell you how excessively angry it makes me to have some one carrying Stories about me to you without their names being given– Who is it that uses my name & busies himself or herself in my affairs & refuses to have their’s divulged– Finally I can only say—that when we are married, it will be in the firm conviction that our circumstances justify it, since that which she now brings is more than ample to meet the increased expenditure– Besides it is our intention to keep our marriage as close as it may be possible & so avoid creditors ears—if it should reach them, explanations will be given sufficient to satisfy them that their interests are not neglected– From anything I may have said you must not read when I am going to be married– It is just possible that I do not know myself—one thing I do regret & that is that the Governor was not told long & merry ago. It would have been in accordance to Lizzie’s wishes & that is every thing to me–
Before I left England I found out by chance that Liz had done every thing she could to raise money to meet my difficulties. This she had done in entire secrecy from me–
Thank you again & again for all your kindness to me & mine, my dearest Sept, &
Ever Believe me
Yrs very affectly
Alfred Barrett
Publication: None traced.
Manuscript: Gordon E. Moulton-Barrett.
1. Underscored four times.
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